Speaking Ozzie-ese

It is very hard to imagine, that a month from today, we will be moving across the Tasman Ditch.

Our good friend Marg, reminded us that it will be exactly 5 years to the month since we left Oz, not realising at the time, that we would one day return to live there again.

CRIKEY!

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This ARVO (afternoon), as I was sorting through the reams of paperwork needed to shift our household over that little body of water, I came across a RIPPER (= great) “Relocating to Australia” Guide. This PAMPHLET (=brochure) was CHOCKA (= full) with GOOD OIL (= good information) about the local language:

“Please take note that many Australians use a number of colloquialisms. At first, English-speakers from other countries may have occasional difficulties understanding parts of every day Australian-English speech…”

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We will obviously need to HAVE A BURL (= try) at our rusty Ozzie vocab, so that our ANKLE BITERS (= kids) and ourselves don’t come across as complete DRONGOS (=stupid, inept person)!

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I’m slowly remembering….

…the common form of greeting is “G’day” or “G’day Mate”. The latter is used mainly by males - everyone is a mate cf. buddy in the USA.

…that it is not a compliment to be called a FRUIT LOOP or a DILL (= a fool)

…your bag of groceries has no relevance to your being told that “you are dressed to kill in your BAG OF FRUIT” (= a suit)

…BARBIES are so much more than voluptuous, money-making dolls. (= BBQ)

…at an Ozzie Barbie, if you get PECKISH (=hungry), you may find SNAGS (= sausages, NOT Sensitive New Age kinda Guys!), TINNIES (= cans of beer), good TUCKER (= food), TOMATO SAUCE (= ketchup in the Northern Hemisphere),YABBIES (= freshwater crayfish), maybe even some SANGERS (= sandwiches), and sometimes even some WITCHETTY GRUBS (= a large, white grub that is hailed by Aborigines as good tucker). But I’m just STIRRING (= being a troublemaker). I’m too much of a WUSS (=coward) to eat witchetty grubs. You might have more adventurous tastebuds of course. ONYA! (= Good on ya!).

And naturally, if you eat all this stuff, you’re likely to embarrass yourself and someone may exclaim, “A BIT MORE CHOKE AND YOU WOULD’VE STARTED!” (= a statement said to someone who has just passed wind in public). GROUSE! (= great!)

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Too much YABBER (=too much talk). I guess I should CALL IT QUITS (= end it there), lest any Ozzies reading this get CHEESED OFF (= annoyed) and accuse me of having a FEW KANGAROOS LOOSE IN THE TOP PADDOCK (= few sandwiches short of a picnic)!